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Understanding and esteem make the child little get hurt (one)
From;  Author:Stand originally
Adult is used to using " equal " children is treated in light of standard and eye, use " good " " bad " will distinguish their behavior and feeling, make children because daily life is medium,often did the thing with dissatisfactory adult and get blame.

Because know how to do ability to earn parental love children is impossible, but he has very depend on parents, such, children feels the complexion act that did not hold and likes to visit father and mother to oneself and his behavior gradually. Actually children him look upon the mistake should compare what think in imaginary center to want to be gotten badly much, consequently children is in get after blame, what bearing compunctious heavy responsibility is to Your Excellency beyond people of anticipation.

Accordingly, parents is in judge child " right, wrong " before, should understand first and respect the child, want to accomplish this a little bit, need learns a few strategy:

One of strategy: Give the child " wrong action " look for a legitimate reason

It is a moonfaced boy flatly, he takes several appearance toy to go everyday nursery school, often play with friend crossing-over toy, often still dropped 9 toys even. Mew also is a lovely little girl, but in small the bottom class in a kindergarten when she also does not take a toy to come to nursery school, also do not love to interact with other child. Below the teacher's requirement, her parents is trying to encourage her to take a toy to go to nursery school everyday, but she says whats are willing, force urgently, she cries with respect to the edge the edge cries: "They want those who grab my toy! "   >> > the child that goes understanding you with childishness

Why the toy that some children can play him together with others, and do some children never take his thing play together with others? If we are judged by adult standard, can think former and easy, fervent, and latter selfishness, chilly, then we can raise a requirement probably to latter, want him " try and people plays together " , or tell him " playing together with others is very happy " etc, if this child still is,cannot help doing falls in adult requirement, but in an instant persist one's old ways, we produced bias probably to this child, imperceptible ground is revealed before the child, more the proper pride that hurt the child.

Actually, what we should solve is not exterior problem, however the substantial problem of behavior: The children that is willing to play him toy together with others has safe feeling, easy as friendly as the person get along, he is not afraid of be in an unfavorable situation, the right that does not need him enroach on of beware of other people; And the children that does not wish to take out thing and others to play together lacks safe sense, he is not selfishness or chilly, deal with the ability self-distrust of others to oneself however, such children is in when facing new case or difficulty, often can shrink back, revolt, atttack others even. So the adult should do not be behavior of requirement child change, give the child adequately safe sense first however, help him build self-confident heart, so afore-mentioned circumstances with respect to be readily solved.
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